Bill O'Reilly can...

...well, he can eat the biggest, stinkiest, wettest piece of dog shit from a dog that has worms that crapped it out on raw chicken contaminated with salmonella.

Why the anger? Didn't we all already know that O'Reilly is a complete douche? Well, yeah. But he has really gone too far. I listen to his "Talking Points Memo" podcast on most mornings (it really gets the blood flowing) and pretty much every one blames the left - or the Secular Progressives (don't get me started on that bullshit nickname) for all of the problems of the world. However, this time he targeted me. No, he didn't mention me, but he did accuse public school teachers of "indoctrinating" their students to be SPs. He even read maybe one sentence from an e-mail that he supposedly got from a 15 year-old student.

At this point you may want your young children to stop reading.

Motherfucker, have you ever even set foot in a real classroom? Have you ever thought that only a completely brainwashed neo-con FoxNews watching 15 year-old would e-mail your splotchy ass? Most 15 year-olds are either playing Guitar Hero, trying to score some weed, or hanging out at some public place that will one day be replaced by a bar. Why don't you come up with some new fucking story to base your idiotic statement on other than the Boulder High School sex-ed assembly that you use twice a week? I know why. Because there are no other examples. Once again, you issue proclamations straight out of your ass that must be true only because you said them. News flash cocksucker: just because you say "fact" before something doesn't mean it actually is a fact. Example: "Fact: the sky is green" See?!? Ass-whore!?! The sky is generally blue unless you live in L.A. where its a brownish blue. In other words, until you actually present some sort of empirical evidence that even 1% of public school teachers are indoctrinating students I suggest you shut your jowly, wrinkled ass-face up - because only the mongloid rednecks that believe in your so-called culture war take your word as scripture. And those people already bought their ticket to hell. In short, choke on the fattest set of diseased rhino testicles and die.

Thanks for listening. Anger subsiding. Sorry about the language Mom. I learned it from Dad

Greatest. Video. Ever

Awesome.

There is a story behind the kid and no, he's not retarded.

Today's List - 10/26

1. There is a teacher that uses my room during my conference. She is horrible and her students do nothing. When you were in high school did you like the teacher that basically let you sit around and do nothing everyday? Not me. I liked doing stuff because I liked to learn and doing work often meant that I didn't have to interact with people.

2. The keys to getting your wine glasses clean is to use a small amount of soap, make sure you give special attention to the rim of the glass and the base, use hot water when you rinse, and to let them dry a little in the air and then finish them off with a dry soft towel. I only say this because watermarks and lipstick stains on wineglasses are a major pet peeve of mine.

3. Liverpool's aging defender Sami Hyppia has scored two goals in the last 5 days. Unfortunately they were in the wrong goal. He is a complete donkey and I am giving him pre-emptive blame for our impending disastrous loss to Arsenal (my brother's team) on Saturday.

4. Pete works too much.

5. We watched "Black Sheep" at Pete and Lauri's last week. Not the Chris Farley Black Sheep but the "horror" movie black sheep that I posted the trailer to a while back. It was awesome.

6. Trader Joe's Thai Noodle Salad. That's all I'm saying.

7. I think I've become allergic to the lactose free string cheese. It destroyed my stomach the last two days.

8. "I want Philly Jim!" The Office really needs to be 1/2 hour. It just works better.

9. After 3 seasons the Ghost Hunters may have captured something that looked sort of like a ghost.

10. Its basketball season already? and hockey? Does anyone actually care? Not me. I don't think I could name more than 3 active NHL players.

11. I've been recording the CNN "Planet in Peril" series. I guess I'm not convinced yet that we are killing ourselves.

Have a weekend.

Star Wars:The TV Show?

George Lucas says that he is creating a TV show based on the Star Wars "franchise". He does say that there are no Skywalkers involved so it will not be based on the overall plot of the six movies.

Could these possibly be good? What could the plot be about? He said something about robots, but it may have been a joke.

I say that this will suck worse than Episode II.

Today's List - 10/16

1. Meetings can eat my ass. I know it sounds like I am bragging, but I am usually the only one in my meetings that has any clue about what is going on. However, today I solved my problem. We had to break up in to small groups as each group would deal with one part of a report we have to create for accreditation. I volunteered to lead a group then quickly told the person in charge that I was taking my group to my room to work. My group was me. I did the work in 15 minutes and then did some planning before returning to drop off the group work. I am the best group ever.

2. One of my students told me today that his brain is like the bottle of water that I drink from in class all the time - by fifth period its running pretty low. I laughed.

3. Tasty combination: Thai food and Riesling.

4. I'm barely paying attention to the baseball playoffs, but I think that the Rockies winning 20 out of their last 21 games is pretty impressive.

5. Euro 2008 qualifying continues tomorrow with some pretty important games. England vs. Russia is at the top of most people's lists. I am still super impressed by the Scots (my paternal heritage). They lead their group over Italy and France. They could easily go through to the final stage as they get group B pushovers Georgia next. However, their final match with Italy could be important too.

6. The mother fucking Galaxy finally decided to start playing and have now won 5 in a row. If they win their next two games they will actually qualify for the playoffs. Thursday night is the last regular season home game and we may even get to see the $50 million pound English guy again.

7. "What is a Jim?"

8. Saw "Into the Wild" on Friday. Crazy shit. I knew the story going in, but have not read the book. I have to say that I ended up feeling different about the main character than I thought I would. Only major downfall of the movie: Eddie Vedder's dominance of the soundtrack. The first single is regularly rotated on KROQ and is maybe the worst song of the millennium next to everything from System of a Down.

9. Transformers is out on DVD. I really dug this movie, but I was very biased by my childhood love of the toys - second only to G.I. Joe. The Special Edition is in a case that is a transformer.

10. I watched some Bill O'Reilly yesterday. I know this is a very "the sky is blue" type statement, but that dude is way off base. The only thing that made him look good is that he had Ann Coulter on. Two things about her: she's a completely retarded bitch and she has a total Adam's Apple.

11. I'm not against Al Gore winning the Nobel Prize per se, but giving him the Nobel Peace Prize seems like a bit of a stretch. I absolutely understand the connection between the environment and peace (ask me in person and I will gladly explain), but he didn't really make that connection himself. That being said, I'm happy for the dude. But will he run?

12. The answers to the Brazilian names were: Luke Skywalker, Darth Vader, Obi Wan Kenobe, C3Po, and Boba Fett.

13. Don't forget to watch the cartoon from the previous post. I'm still laughing.

A little history lesson through cartoon

Maybe the single greatest video I've ever seen. Caution: Not Safe for Work or Children. Maybe I should not say that so Andrew can get Greg to show it to his kids like the "Read a book" video.

Jincha

Have you ever wondered what your name would be if you were a Brazilian soccer player? Well, check out this website too find out. I'm Jincha.

Bob Dylan = Dylando
George Bush = Georgildo
William Jennings Bryan = William Jennio
Charles Grodin = Groda
Barack Obama = Obamiano
Chuck Norris = Chimo
Pol Pot = Perto
Robot Chicken = Chickaca
Try to guess: Luka, Vadino, Obi Wisco, Pinhosa, Finhosa

Today's List - 10/11

1. There's a Dollar Club on Lake and Mountain near where I play soccer. Do you know how much a box of cereal is there? 99-cents. Why? As the sign outside explains: 99% = 99-cents. Now I get it.

2. The Taco Bell one block from the Dollar Club is no longer there. It is now Taco Baja. From the outside it looks like they kept everything except the menu. There was a pizza place in Redlands that did the same thing - was Little Ceasars, now Antonious. The pizza at Antonious was cheaper and better.

3. People are assholes. Teachers much more so in many cases. I am moving between two classes this year. Most of the storage space is still occupied by the previous teacher who says that the teacher she is sharing with will give her no space, but she won't deal with the problem. I used simple economics to solve the problem. I dropped a note in her box saying that if the stuff is still in and on top of the closets on Monday I will put it in boxes out on the walkway. In economic terms that is called incentive.

4. I am going to rant some time in the next 3 days about Bush, spying, and torture. I'm too angry and busy to do it now.

5. I think Pete has given up on the prospects of our upcoming presidential election. I know he has officially declared the Republican candidates as useless. I agree. I'm sure my old friend Peter does not (I think he's still a Giuliani supporter for some reason).

6. Former Assistant U.S. Attorney John Atchison killed himself in jail. I don't have a problem with that. He flew to Michigan looking to have sex with a 5 year-old girl. (For a disturbing and yet pretty funny discussion of this story you should listen to SModcast.)

7. I love soccer, but there is a dark side to the game that you are all aware of: diving. Here's a recent example. This is a game between Italy's AC Milan and Scotland's Celtic. Milan were the heavy favorites but the goal that is celebrated put Celtic ahead. Watch what happens afterward.


A fan gets by security, runs by Milan keeper Dida, and gives him a little tickle. Dida starts to run after him, then falls on the ground later to be carried off on a stretcher with an icepack. Why? He hoped to get his team's loss thrown out because a fan caused him to leave. The real result. Celtic get fined a measly 25,000 pounds while Dida the Douche gets a two game suspension. The fan was also banned for life from all Celtic matches.

8. Did I mention that I have a very cute little niece? No? Well, here's a picture.


Enjoy the weekend

Today's Short List 10/2

1. No word from Pete about adding stuff to Rat Race. I'll let you know when (if?) it happens. I even have an idea already.

2. What the hell is Leet? Some really nerdy ass shit if you ask me.

3. Is it seriously only Tuesday?

4. Liverpool continues its Champions League quest tomorrow against Marseilles.

5. Did you hear about Brittney Spears? I don't care either.

6. The new fake grass field and all-weather track at South Pas High look to be almost ready. I hope they let the public use it. Can a public school keep the public from using their facilities? I'm going with "no".

7. Dethklok?

8. I ventured into the belly of the beast on Sunday and somehow came out alive. In other words, I went to the Costco in Alhambra in the middle of the day. Let's just say that there is a certain type of person that frequents this establishment that tend to ignore the presence of other people when they park their cart in the middle of isles as they nibble on taquito samples and pretend that their kid is not running around screaming. I didn't use a cart so I think that's what got me out in less than 30 minutes.

9. Teacher meetings are horrible. I literally walked out of one today because it was so bad.

10. Which was better - Die Hard or Lethal Weapon?