But in the unlikely story that is America, there has never been anything false about hope

Friday, August 05, 2005

You got crapped on

What are the worst responsibilities that a person can take on to help others out? Here's my list:

1. House-sitting or taking care of pets. It never seems like a big deal since you usually only go once a day, but somehow this 30 minute chore becomes the biggest pain in your ass after a few days. It seems like you can go 3 years without having anything to do at 9am, but when you have to deal with the cats or dogs 9am becomes the most popular time to get anything done.

2. Permanent designated driver. This is the person that often volunteers to drive because they never really drink too much, which is pretty cool for those of us who always drink too much to drive. However, when the PDD decides that they do want to drink 2 things always happen: (1) the rest of the people fight over who will take over the responsibility and (2) the person that does take the responsibility ends up drinking too much anyways because either they think the PDD will likely not drink as much as they said or they just forget that they promised to take this responsibility for once.

3. Collecting money from a group to pay the bill. I used to get suckered with this job when I did retreat weekends through a church group. Maybe these people thought that the miracle of the loaves and fishes would repeat itself with the $1.73 they threw in for the appetizer, burger n' fries and 3 Bud Lights that they had. However, I would collect money for a bill that ran around $200 dollars and get $150. This is when I became a dick and went around the table and found out that people would only include the actual amount of the food they bought not including the appetizer they ordered because someone else ate 1 of the 39 hot wings.

4. Buying tickets. Unless you get cash in advance, never buy tickets for anyone unless you have easy access to their house so you can steal shit to sell on E-bay to make back the money. I bought 3 Galaxy tickets for a friend's daughter. There were several people that I knew that still needed tickets, but I held them for this girl. Her dad calls as I am driving to the game to tell me that the daughter backed out. This was the second time she pulled this shit on me. So even if the person is your best friend - CASH IN ADVANCE!

5. Owning a truck. Hell no I won't help you move.

6. Group projects. This can be groups for regular studying or group assignments or even committees at work. Somehow I always end up in a group of people that have no idea what is asked of them or who just don't know their ass from a hole in the ground. For example, I was in a committee at the school where I work. We had to develop programs to build school pride. This other teacher said that we needed a way to get kids to not wear their hoods in class. Here's an idea genius - tell them to take of their fucking hood! In any case, I always end up doing all the work because the other people in the group are retarded.

So that's all I can think of right now, but please feel free to add any other shitty responsibilities.

2 comments:

Pete said...

1. When pet-sitting, insist on house sittng as well. If your going to take care of thier pooches you should at least be able to eat all thier food and drink all thier good liquor.

2.I hate it when that happens.

3.You should see Tim hunt dow people for camping money. Its brilliant. Some people show up, eat and drink all weekend and then get offended when asked to pitch in.

4. That sucks! I'd be miffed.

5. I always insist on the person renting a U-haul. Its $40 and it cuts everything to one trip. You can't crap in a pick up truck.

6.See my early archived posts regarding group work.

Great Post keep them coming.

Randy said...

I more or less agree with Pete. He is still a Trekkie nerd though.